The very exciting project I shot at the YouTube Space LA is out! Thanks to @thelilynews for the feature - check out the video on their IGTV and YouTube! I’m talking being vulnerable online, the pressure of constant creation, and discovering my #asexuality. And The Lily is a dope magazine for women by women at the @washingtonpost !
#FemaleHustler #SideHustle #LightsCameraAction #WomenWorking #YouTubeLife
It’s so rare for me to get to hang with other Black creatives who are all motivated, talented, and just as nerdy about YouTube as I am. My week at YouTube NextUp was incredible. I learned so much from listening to my fellow creators, and getting to focus in on my channel for a week was such a treat. I have so much love for my new YouTube fam 🧡🤗🎥✨
#ytnextup #youtubeblack #makersgonnamake #hustleharder #calledtocreate
Yesterday, I had a panic attack. Like a full on, sobbing, hyperventilating, curled in a ball panic attack. Out of the blue, something picked at a mental scab and the wound wouldn’t stop bleeding. I went down a path of thinking I was unremarkable and unworthy and unspecial and hopeless, and I crumbled. It took about an hour for me to get myself back together again.
This is not the first time this has happened, but it was the first time I was around other people when it started, and I was mortified. In a room full of people, sharing what made them remarkable, and I could barely keep it together - much less say anything positive about myself. I felt isolated in a room of lovely people, and then I felt self conscious about that isolation, and then selfish for thinking only of myself. I couldn’t get out of my own head.
I don’t say this to win your sympathy or your pity or to fish for compliments. This isn’t about external validation, just like my emotions had nothing to do with external criticism - the only person I allow to talk crap to me is myself. I say this to acknowledge where I am. People talk about only showing your highlights reel online, but I also want to acknowledge the struggle. I struggle with self-esteem and self-worth, on a deep, personal, illogical level. Sometimes I hate myself and my life even though both are obviously amazing. I’m constantly working at staying positive. But sometimes I slip. I am a work in progress. Today was better. Tomorrow will be better still.
#MentalHealth #OneDayAtATime #SelfCompassion
Behind the scenes shooting at #YTNextUp! Exercising those production skills 😉🎥 #YouTubeBlack #CreativeLifeHappyLife #MakersGonnaMake #BlkCreatives
Got to chat with @goangie on @angieangeam this morning, and hang with @djmoney in the studio! I was on Working Woman Wednesday talking YouTube, Harvard, and going for your dreams!
#hustleharder #goforit #acreativedc #youtubelife
Unleash your inner diva 💁🏾♀️ 💎✨
Had fun with costumes for the next video and I’m pretty excited about it - new one coming at ya tomorrow!
#popofcolor #onewomanshow #dressuptime #purple💜 #divas👑